Friday, June 25, 2010

Murphy's Lesser Known Laws

Thanks to "Taxidave" on the old hippie website for the best laugh I've had in weeks.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.

The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking.

Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Obituary

Which freedom is next to go?

Thanks, Justice Roberts...you so-called right wing radical, you sided with the communists in the White House and DOJ. Put the razor wire manufacturers on overtime. Obama will need to build concentration camps after he declares vets, tea partiers, religious groups, and those with conservative stickers on their cars, terrorist groups.

We'll never be able to vote our way out of this socialist quagmire!

RIP Free Speech

Monday, June 21, 2010

Dead Elephant Society's New Mascot-A Jellyfish


GOP's New Mascot


John Boehner's threat to pull Texas Representative Joe Barton's committee chairmanship for his Obama putdown is the type of stunt that has eroded grassroots support for the Republican Party in recent years. What a spineless thing to do.

Boehner...get a clue! No matter how much you grovel and try to get along, the media will never like you, and the Democrats sure don't like you, so all you are doing with this gutless stunt is making certain that half the conservative voters don't like you either.

If you can't stand up for the Constitution, do the honorable thing and resign. We don't want career politicians that don't represent us.

III

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Billionaires Of The World Unite!



So Warren Buffett and Bill Gates believe that all American billionaires should donate half their wealth to charity. Wow! Warren will have to shop for Hamburger Helper to get by on the measly 31 billion remaining after he gives half of it away, and Bill will likely have to clip coupons from the Sunday paper to make it on his mere 26 billion.

I have a better idea. Instead of giving half to charity, why don't you all keep 10 or 20 million for walking around money, and donate the rest to the US Treasury. Then your good friend, Chairman Obama, will have a little seed money to buy more votes and redistribute wealth to the really needy folks, like SEIU members. It's a win-win situation.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Rain at Last!

After several weeks of hot, dry, weather, we closed our seasonal rainfall deficit in two days. My rain gauge measured exactly 5", but not far from here they recorded nearly 11".

The grass had gotten so dry, it looked like late summer with yellow, thinning patches and uneven growth. Now, it looks like April...rich, green and lush...and all within two days. No matter how much you water from a hose, it doesn't begin to match the results of natural rainwater.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Checking In

There are times when I simply don't feel like writing anything and this past week has been one of those times...in spades. I get so fed up with world events that I'd like to put a fence up around our little acre and throw rocks at anyone, or anything, that tries to enter. It's a case of the bah-humbug syndrome, summer version.

If I don't post for a few days, I'm building fences and gathering rocks.